A Little Update

Well, the kitties are starting to coexist peacefully, and I am happy to report that not only have they been sharing spaces, but Slinky has also licked Sapphire several times and everyone seems fine with that. Whew! The only problem is that Slinky is getting quite fat, as she cleans out the bowl of whatever Sapphire leaves behind. It's a work in progress.

This next week will be my last as Long Term Sub. It's been a long, complicated 5 months since I started at the school. First the job I accepted was changed to part time, then I took on the permanent building sub job, that was eventually cut from the budget. Now the long term sub position is ending and it took me a long time to decide what I wanted to do as I moved forward. I applied for quite a few positions within schools, but became frustrated that many (read: most) were not permanent positions, and I just didn't want to be going through job searching again. The stress of not knowing where my paycheck would be coming from every few months has taken its toll. It has been a year since my back injury. Acupuncture is helping somewhat. But did I really want to continue the stress of job searching for the sake of being in public schools? I couldn't decide.

So I started looking for positions as a nanny. Although the principal at my current job told me that working in child care positions was not helping me to find a job in the school systems, I decided that what will ultimately boost my ability to get a job as a classroom teacher would be my Master's Degree. And frankly, the jobs that were calling me back in the schools just wouldn't fund going back to school. Especially since those jobs would only be 180 days per year. So after a lot of thinking, worrying, and going back and forth, I made the decision to look for a position as a nanny.

So, that is where we are. I have had several promising interviews, and I hope to have something lined up by the end of the week. This year has been....indescribable. But I am hoping for a healthy and stable 2011. And I hope yours is as well. ;)



Bright Pink Kitty is Here!

Here she is! Bright Pink Floral Kitty is the first plushie to be made with my new fabric. She isn't holiday, but she'll be making her debut at my next craft show in November. Can you tell why I love her fabric so much? *peeks around at the page* When I went to the fabric store, I was just looking for holiday fabric. When I came across this, and several other generic fabrics, I couldn't help but yank it into my cart! Instead of going for the soft, cute fabric, this fall/winter I'm going for vibrant, colorful patterns! Don't worry....more to come!

On the employment front, a long term sub position covering a maternity leave opened up in my school. My current position is finished on Friday, but if I get hired for this next sub position, I will be ok until around January. Then I will begin my job hunt again. What a long year this has been! I thought I wouldn't be writing about job searching anymore, but here we are. I am feeling a lot better this week, and I'm glad I had some time to work on sewing. I've got a lot to look forward to next month...my second craft show, my driver's license test *finally!* and a trip to Disney World and Universal (for Harry Potter!!!!). It's going to be exciting, I just hope I can keep up.



You will not believe what happened today....

I got laid off. Again. *sigh*

The position I took last month is a grant funded position, and for some reason, the superintendent has eliminated those positions. Even though they were just added this year. I'm not sure why this happened, but (if I can toot my own horn) I am taking it very well. Especially considering the new car and the vacation we just paid for. Perhaps it's because this year has been so wild. Perhaps it's because I was nervous that I would be let go eventually (since it was just a one year position). Perhaps it's because we've been able to survive that past year with me on worker's comp and unemployment. Or maybe it just hasn't sunk in yet. For whatever reason, I have shed no tears and am not seriously worried.

Tomorrow, I may feel different. But for tonight, I'm ok. 

Regardless, any good thoughts, encouraging anecdotes, or holiday orders *wink!* would be greatly appreciated.  Take care everyone.

Birthday Bear Gets His Shirt!

This morning, I finally finished Birthday Bear, shirt and all! I made his shirt by printing off the text on printable fabric, which I later sewed on to the front of the shirt. The shirt itself was an adventure, and if I hadn't been in such a rush, I would have taken pictures throughout. Basically, I made it completely from scratch, using Birthday Bear as a very rough guide. The back of the shirt is much bigger than the front, since his arms sit on the front of his body. I used white cotton, which wasn't as white as the printable fabric, but I added some detail stitching to detract from that. :)

The front of the shirt is one piece, and the back is two pieces (since his head is so big!). I started out by cuffing the sleeve edges, then sewing the three pieces together so that they open like a hospital gown. Next, I hemmed the neckline and bottom of the shirt, all of this in white thread. I kept trying this on the bear over and over to make sure everything was fitting properly. I did have to take the front in a little to make it sit flat, but that was easily done.

Next, I stitched the text on the front of the shirt using a small zigzag stitch in orange cotton thread. This is the first time I've really played with length and width so I tested the stitch on a scrap of fabric first. I decided that the shirt looked too much like a lab coat, so I also added the orange zigzag around the sleeve cuffs, neckline and bottom of the shirt. To finish up, I hand stitched the two pieces in the back so that the shirt would lie flat. And that was it!

Still waiting to hear back about whether I am officially hired or not. I don't know if Slinky can sense it, but yesterday she actually let me hold her! This is something she hates, and it didn't last very long, but I needed the snuggle. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed reflecting back on all that has happened this year. The center I used to work at closed its doors on Friday and my former coworkers are posting their photos of the last day. I got this wave of finality seeing them, realizing there is absolutely no going back, only moving forward. I just wish I wasn't stuck in neutral right now (yes, a car reference!! Been practicing all weekend!).

Where's the Exit on this Roller Coaster?!

So to give you an idea of my tolerance for roller coasters, or just rides in general, let me tell you a story. About Splash Mountain. A very family friendly attraction that thousands, nah, MILLIONS of people consider to be one of the most fun rides at Disney World. My boyfriend and I took a trip to Disney World last October. He is a big thrill chaser, and I am the kind of girl who gets nauseous on a ladder. No joke. Well, he played down most of the rides so that I would go on them, and this strategy worked for just about everything...except Splash Mountain.

You know how there are signs all the way up to the ride that say, Turn back now!!! This has extreme drops!!! I swear I felt like an animal being led to slaughter, being slowly shuffled closer and closer to the crazy contraption that was going to be my demise, unable to find a way to get out, but in all honesty not wanting to seem like a total baby. I got on the ride, against my better judgement, and just so happened to be in the front seat. Behind me sat a 5 year old boy and his parents. We settled into the log and off we went. I think I remember a couple smaller drops, but they weren't really much worse than Thunder Mountain Railroad, which I enjoyed. But those obnoxious animals all singing happily could not camouflage my fear when we came around the bend and began to ascend the dark, damp tunnel. I gripped onto whatever was closest to me as hard as I could, chanting over and over, "I don't want to do this. I want to get out! I need to get off this ride!" hysterically, while the child behind me chatted casually to his parents about how fun this was going to be. No, child...it was not fun. To me, it felt like this:

And let me tell you, those people on that ride were TERRIFIED! I heard the screams.

In all seriousness, it was very similar to the time my high school best friend forced me on the California Adventure roller coaster, you know the one around Mickey's head? I screamed at her the entire time that I would kill her, my stomach felt like it was sitting somewhere near my nasal cavity, and afterward I was almost sick to my stomach....but not quite. I survived that one, and I survived the much less intimidating but just as frightening and nausea-inducing Splash Mountain. But I never want to do it again.

It's the drops that get me, that feeling of no control and that pulling sensation in your stomach. That's what I'm feeling like today. This year has been a roller coaster that I can't find my way off of. It's not going to hurt me, but I am probably going to be scared out of my mind and a little nauseous. Yesterday I was offered my dream job....assisting the reading specialist by working with small groups of children who are not meeting grade level. My ultimate goal is to be a reading specialist, so this job was perfect, and the school has a large population of second language learners, with whom I can use my Spanish that has been lying dormant since high school and I have missed using so much. I was so excited that we went out to dinner and dessert to celebrate! But this morning I got a call saying that the funding has been cut, and the position will likely only be half time....and it still has to be approved by the superintendent before it is final. I would still want it if it is part time, but it would mean searching for a second job.

I also had a decent sized back spasm last night and it is still acting up so I've been in bed all day. I ask you...where's the exit?!

My List of Do's when Interviewing

Yeah, I know...I'm not an expert! But after 6 months of applying and interviewing, nearing 20 interviews finished, I figured I would share with you the Seven Do's I try to tell myself when gearing up for an interview.

1. Keep your look simple, polished, but original.

I was really tempted to wear my new white sweater with my favorite pants, which are black, to my most recent interview. Maybe with a bold piece of jewelery? Well, I don't have bold jewelery. And black pants with a plain white sweater looks so blah....I've watched too much What Not to Wear to make that mistake. Instead, I decided to wear my new white sweater with a floral skirt I made earlier this summer. Not only does this add some color and pattern to my outfit, the skirt fits perfectly around my tummy, so I won't worry about any unflattering lines, and it is long enough to be work appropriate, not sexy or frumpy. For makeup, I go more neutral and natural than I would for a nice dinner, but with the basics covered. Moisturizer, light mineral powder foundation, eyes and a light lip tint. I don't want them to think I'm going to be late to work because of my makeup routine.

2. Remember the names of the people interviewing you, and use it.

I learned this from my boyfriend, who deals with many people in his company over the phone. I thought it was silly when I first met him, he would repeat the person's name three times on the phone, but when I went into an interview and had no idea who I had talked to on the phone, I realized how lame I seemed. Ask for the name if you don't remember it, write it down and use it. Which brings me to my next point...

3. Send thank you notes!

I didn't send these when I first started my job search and quickly decided to incorporate it into my routine. Which is one reason you should remember the interviewers' names...you're going to want to include them in your thank you note. If you've interviewed with a large company or with a school district (like me), addressing the company as a whole, HR or whom it may concern makes it sound like you didn't take the time to learn anything about who you spoke with, so why would they want to take the time on you?

4. Be polite, even when they aren't.

Early on in my search, I came across a couple people who were less than professional. Whether it was asking inappropriate questions (someone ate her lunch during our meeting, told me I would be hard pressed to find a school that would offer health insurance, only wanted to know how my previous school ran their program and paid their teachers, and nothing about me), or making rude assumptions to your face (someone told me I was obviously in teaching for the money because of the age group I wanted to work with), it is always better to take a deep breath and handle the situation with tact. It isn't always easy, and it can be tempting to make a smart remark, but I try to be polite, yet not ignore the comment. Rather, I try to address it as politely as I can without seeming wishy-washy or apologetic. If all else fails, thank them for their time and make your escape. It can be a jungle out there.

5. Have a portfolio of your work to refer to during the interview.

This is a standard item to bring to teaching interviews, but I'm not sure how it works with corporate settings. I've found that my portfolio, when it is complete and polished, can be my best asset in an interview. Sometimes I have difficulty explaining exactly how I implemented an activity without going into a long winded speech, so I pull out my portfolio to show photos and lesson plans of successes, as well as documentation. My portfolio contains all the items I would send in initially (cover letter, resume, recommendation letters, transcript, and licenses), writing samples, documentation of lessons and environments I've planned. Pictures are a fast way to show the interviewer what you look like in action, without them taking your word for it. And having work samples gives them a way to preview what they might see around review/report time. I always makes sure I refer to it at least once, especially if they don't ask for it.

6. When you get home, apply for at least one more job!

It's never a good idea to think you've got one in the bag. It can take a while to hear back from someone, and that is time you could have been interviewing at more places. If it's a no, you haven't lost any of that precious job search time, and if it is a yes, you can always let the other employer know you've accepted another position. This is the hardest part for me because I always want to put all my eggs in one basket, but it isn't realistic.

7. Remember...they want you to succeed!

This is another thing that has helped me stay calm. The interviewer wants to find the right person, and they are hoping you are it! While you may not always be the best fit, they aren't there to prove you're bad at what you do...which is what used to cause a lot of my nerves. Just do your best and prove to them why you were such a great candidate that they called you in!

Thankfully, Other People Blog Too

Good morning everyone. Just thought I'd include a shot of my kitty exploring my kitchen/sewing table, since I still haven't finished my skirt tutorial yet. I had a bad stomach ache this weekend that turned out to be (I think) a kidney stone (most likely because I haven't been taking my baking soda....must replace moldy juice jug today!!). I didn't think it was a stone because this time the nausea/upset stomach came before the pain, but now the pain is here and I am consequently not working on my tiered skirt. I promise it will come soon!

In job news, woke up to two requests for an interview this morning, which made me both extremely happy and extremely anxious. Not because I'm worried about the interview...at this point, I've been on around 15+ interviews so I'm not so nervous about what I am going to say. No, I'm anxious about making a decision and if I am making the right one. I'm finding that the elementary level jobs I am being called about are either long term sub or part time. Part time lead teacher wouldn't be so hard to choose, but part time assistant pays less, which would mean getting a second job....not that I am opposed to that at all, but it means more job searching. I know, I know, life isn't easy, at least I'm getting my foot in the door, and there are far worse things to happen to people. I know I also shouldn't get myself so worked up about this, but as a worrier at heart, it all seems 10 times scarier in my head. I'm so used to full time lead teacher, even if it is in a toddler room, that it is scary to think of only having secured a part time position.

The more I read over what I just wrote, the less scary is actually seems. Things will be ok...they'll work out. And I should even have time to go back to school. *big, deep breath*

I came across two blog posts today that really cheered me up though, and I just had to share them. First, Sarah over at Yes, Teacher! shared this Jack Handey quote as part of her Mondays with Jack, and it really made me laugh: "I hope some animal never bores a hole in my head and lays its eggs in my brain, because later you might think you're having a good idea but it's just eggs hatching." Thanks, Sarah, for starting my morning out with a laugh!

Erika over at Oops! I Craft My Pants shared her latest craft...a wacky and unique frame idea: covering a picture frame with gum. I just love Erika's blog and this was another quirky post that just made my day. Check out the frame and Erika's fantastic blog here!

All I can say is, thank goodness for blogging today. :)

Hot Pink = Happiness

When I'm feeling a little unsure, and perhaps not so pretty, it helps to doll up the digits...in hot pink.

Waiting to hear back from the interviews. I hate waiting. And all I can seem to hear in my head is, "You're efforts and background are commendable, but there were many applicants..." Or maybe I've just gotten that standard rejection email from schoolspring too many times. Looking at a long list of "Not Hired" that I can't delete off my account just doesn't inspire confidence, but unfortunately, that's what you need when you're trying to convince a potential employer how much they would benefit from adding you to their pay roll.

Not my best paint job ever. This stuff from Sephora, just $5, has the most saturated color, and the lushest, thickest brush I have ever used. It was awesome. However, trying to remove mistakes? Yeah, the underside of my fingers are very pink.

Finally got a day to do some sewing and I finished my two projects I needed to do. I felt so exhausted all day, for no good reason, so I didn't work on the test-skirt I wanted to make out of scraps. Table that for another day. At the end of the day, though, my shiny, bright pink, ultra saturated toesies put a smile on my face. Hope they put one on yours too.

You're My Cha Cha

Today, this blog is dedicated to all those people who have supported me this week, either through sales or by coming on my blog, clicking around, using my Google search, etc...because I was short on money this month and was worried I wouldn't be able to pay either my rent, student loans or health insurance on time...one of them was going to have to get pushed back a little. But thanks to those who have ordered from my shop or checked out the ads on my blog, I will be ok! I know it sounds corny, but I love you all for giving me some support when I needed it! *big squishy hugs!*

One of those orders was a Mini Kitty that the Curious Cupcake shop chose. This is my first mini, and I must say, she turned out as good as I could hope for! She's a little larger than half-size, but still quite a bit smaller than her big sister. I was able to take my regular pattern, placing those pieces under my paper and eyeballing about a half inch off the sides. I'm making a mini Ruby 'Roo for Karilan, who won the One Month Giveaway...I'm excited to see how that one turns out. And my other two orders were for big Ruby 'Roos! So there will be a lot of sewing this week!

I finally went to Staples and got myself some packing supplies so I don't have to pay extra at the post office. That with my new business cards, thank you cards by Invite Me, and some more tags that I'm printing out tonight, will have me ready to send out all these orders. Keep them coming everyone!!! =D 

I know this is a short post, but I've got lots of sewing to do!

Hip Hip!

Photo courtesy of college magazine

I can't believe it has been three days since my last post! And I've done very minimal sewing....well, that's because it has been a busy end-of-week. On Thursday, my back was flaring something awful, so did a little bit more sewing on the birthday bear for my boyfriend's mechanic's son's first birthday (that's a long one!). Then I took a nap in preparation for our long evening. We drove down to MGM at Foxwoods Casino to go see Weezer...for free! The casino offered us free tickets (read: please come gamble) and we jumped at them. Now, I'm not a huge Weezer fan or anything...more of a casual listener, but I've always enjoyed what I heard. We got there just 15 minutes before the show and found our seats in the nosebleeds while the opening act, Rival Schools, was playing. They weren't too bad, I kinda enjoyed the music....more so than the frontman's voice, but there you have it. After another 25 minutes, Weezer finally came on and I was surprised at how much fun I had! Rivers Cuomo, Weezer's frontman, was beyond entertaining! Jumping down into the crowd during a lot of the concert, letting fans sing into his mic, grabbing people's hats, rolling off the stage in a desk chair, jumping onto the drum kit via a trampoline. They played a lot of their biggest hits...Island in the Sun being my favorite, or maybe Buddy Holly. It's a toss up. My back was really starting to hurt, so I was standing, sitting, trying to stretch out my back during the entire thing. By the end of the night, I was really feeling it, but it was totally worth it.

Yesterday, I had an interview for a floating teacher position....a little last minute, but it went well. I still have my other interview in August, but could this be a glimmer of hope? Could I be employed in the next couple of weeks? I sure hope so!! We spent the rest of the afternoon at the Museum of Science, checking out the new Whale exhibit. It was so hot outside there was no way I was going to do anything outdoors. By the time we got home, around 7pm, I was so exhausted that I went to bed...and slept til 10 this morning! Hopefully, the rest of the weekend will be a little more productive...or at least spent at the beach in Rhode Island. We'll see.

One Month!

Well, it has been a whole month since I started this blog, and just a little over a month since I started sewing. It seems like such a short period of time, and yet it also feels like the time is going by very slow. I'm still struggling to sleep at night, and subsequently sleep most of the morning away. I hate this, I feel so unproductive! I suppose a lot of it has to do with a mix up at the doctor's office with my hormone therapy....didn't refill my prescription for two weeks! This might not seem like a big deal, but when dealing with endometriosis, it makes a big impact. Needless to say, I've had a big swing in headaches and fatigue, and some pain on my right side which may or may not be a cyst. It's really slowed me down this week and gotten me in a rotten mood. I go through spurts of feeling really geared up about my sewing projects to feeling like nothing will come of it and I won't find a job come September. My back has flared a bit (again, possibly the hormones) and I'm feeling like I did before I started sewing. Just a little frustrated and disappointed and down spirited.

But again, I have to remind myself that it has only been a month! What a short time to change gears so drastically! I'm wondering what the rest of this year will have in store for me.

Since I'm sponsoring a giveaway on the Bloomin' Babies blog, it got me to thinking about doing one myself. Would any of you readers be interested in a custom order giveaway here on Silver Rose Sewing? Let me know your thoughts!

Well, that's all for now. It's really late (or should I say early!) and I'm hoping this venting will help me clear my mind and get some sleep. I have a lot of projects coming up, including making a birthday gift for a friend's son's first birthday. And I better get some sleep if I'm going to finish all the work I have planned! Good night....or morning?

Muddled

I really need to shift my sleep schedule by about...2-3 hours. I can't sleep at night, then I sleep in in the morning. I've been on this schedule ever since I hurt my back in January and no matter how early I wake myself up or how much I do during the day, I can't get to sleep at night. I guess that just goes to show you how exhausting it really is chasing toddlers around all day.

Besides the not sleeping part, I miss the socialization of working. 5 days a week I had a room full of toddlers and two co-teachers to socialize with, and then of course the rest of the building during lunch breaks, playground, computer work time. And the parents. I talked to so many people at my job that I didn't realize how much I would miss it when it was gone. I don't know if it was the 4 months of "I can't go anywhere because I can't get out of bed/can't sit that long" that I kept telling everyone, or asking that they come over to my house so I would have a comfortable place to lay on the couch, but since I've been able to be up and moving and social again, I feel like my social life is just plain gone. Without the hustle and bustle of work, my life feels dull and boring and repetitive. Sewing has helped a bit, but I still feel that need to talk to people. I feel like I post more on facebook than I have in a long time, simply because I'm bored and I want to talk to people. I've become one of those people who posts everything on facebook, hoping that it might spark a conversation with someone. But of course, I think people are starting to tune me out instead. I do that when someone posts too often. It's understandable.

It's just hard when your life seems to have shrunk to such a small little space in the world, with so few people in it. I've tried to be strong and positive about everything that has happened this year, but I feel like I've been limited. Back in high school, when I injured my back, I knew I would not be able to dance anymore. Those funny hopes to become a dancer turned into a love of watching others dance, and yearning to move like that, feel that excitement again. I found something I loved just as much: teaching. And this year, I feel like I'm 18 all over again, my life turning a corner and limiting me again. No more toddlers, no more infants, no more young preschool. No more lifting. No more caregiving. Which of course is something I came to really love about teaching toddlers, that relationship you build as a caregiver that you don't get with teaching first grade.

And then there's first grade...and kindergarten, and second grade. I'm finding that my spirits are diminishing slowly, feeling that I might NOT get those jobs, that I might be lucky just to be an assistant this year. Then what? Will I go back to school? Can I afford that? I think I've jumped into this sewing because it takes my mind off that fear. And the hope that by selling my work, I could have a new passion, a new way to make a living, and be able to go back to school seems so exciting. But I keep finding these road blocks, like cost to get registered to sell in MA (which is one of only 3 states that requires this, btw), possibly the cost of renting a space at a local shop, which was offered to me this week. Do I really want to pursue this? Or do I just want this to be a hobby, making myself clothes. I'm struggling with this decision, but I've decided that I will at least take the first steps and give myself the option. Who knows what will happen in 3 months. Maybe I'll get that job I want and sewing will go back to being a hobby. Maybe my bears and blankets will have a niche and start to sell. I just wish there was some way to see 3 months down the line and know which way I should go. But of course, that's the risk in life. I know risk is supposed to be the fun and unexpected part of life, but I've always hated new and unexpected experiences and tried desperately to prepare myself for them...or avoid them.

Well....this week I'm working on my own projects...just for me. And maybe work on a new project I thought of tonight. We'll see. I just wish I could fall asleep before 3 am.

My first dress and a little stress

Yesterday, despite the fact that I was sick, lacking any energy or motivation, I decided to get started on my first dress. I bought a See & Sew pattern from Joann Fabrics and an abstract black, white and red stretchy fabric. I figured since it was a pattern I'd be able to whip it out quickly with little to no alterations needed. *sigh* Boy, was I naive.

First off, I had this silly idea that I could make different folds in the fabric to leave a more whole scrap piece. Of course, I forgot that the pattern needs to stay vertical and I made my first cut so the pattern was horizontal. No worries, I bought enough fabric this time to make up for mistakes. I cut new top pieces and began to sew. The dress was fast and easy, and even though I was feeling worse as the night wore on, I kept sewing. I was a woman with a mission and no amount of sore throat, aches or stomach cramps were going to stop me! That was, until I tried on my finished product.


Hello frumpy! The neckline that looked sooooo cute on the pattern packaging looked boxy and frumpy on me. I obviously didn't need to use the larger size, especially with such stretchy fabric. Not only that, but the waist was about 4 inches too low and was so loose it looked like I had no waist. I found the energy, after some dinner cooked by my very patient and caring boyfriend, to add some pretty elastic lace from the store in Cambridge to the waistline of my dress. Here, I think, is when I really began feeling like poo. I accidentally sewed the waistline to about 2 inches of the bust line. Frustrated, feeling yuckier by the minute, I carefully snipped the stitching out and redid that section of the waistband. Tried the dress on...fit a little better around the waist, but the top still looked two sizes too big and way too boring. Exhaustion setting in, I gave up for the night and decided to make some alterations, hopefully in the way of a cute neckline and taking in the waist a bit more, another day.

That other day is NOT today. I spent most of the night being sick and didn't get to bed until 3 am as a result. Still have a horrible sore throat and just feeling exhausted this morning...or should I say, afternoon. My new dress will have to wait until I am a little more coherent, or I may end up sewing the hemline to the neckline, and end up ripping it to pieces in frustration.

On the job front, I've applied for yet another 3 teaching positions, as per the unemployment requirements. Still haven't received my first check from them. Must call if I don't in the next couple of days. I'm still surprised by the fact that you can be an assistant teacher or paraprofessional with no degree or license, yet they want a Master's degree just to be a first year teacher. As I have my Bachelor's, I seem to fit somewhere in the middle. I applied for both, hoping I will get the latter rather than the former. I also got a call about an infant/toddler position from someone who found my resume online. Must call her back too. I don't look forward to saying, "Thank you for calling me but I can't do toddlers, my body can't handle it anymore." I'm hoping she won't laugh at me. At the ripe ol' age of 25, I already have physical ailments preventing me from doing work. *sigh* I swear if I hear a sentence that starts with the phrase, "You're too young to be worrying about..." I will throw a tantrum. Actually, I MUST be old enough to worry about back problems, arthritis, fertility, etc because I already am. Don't judge a book by its publishing date, people.

Project 1

This is my very first project, sewn on my very first sewing machine. I used a tank top I already new I liked and traced roughly around it. The first time, however, I made it a bit too small, not leaving much room for hemming and stitching. But the second attempt turned out pretty great. Feels wonderful and made just for me. The skirt was easy enough. I measured my waist where I wanted it to sit, then added about 20 inches to the bottom hem and cut diagonally to there. The waist is elastic because, hello! It's comfortable and way easier than learning to sew a zipper, which I WILL try later in the summer.

This is the cheap-o sewing machine I found on Amazon that inspired me to sew my own clothes. I have only used the straight and zig-zag stitches so far. I've been really excited about making different outfits, but not motivated enough to explore different stitches. I'm sure I will as the summer goes on.

Why I Decided to Sew

I started sewing because I bought a sewing machine. And I bought a sewing machine because I needed to hem a pair of pants and my hand stitching is oh-so-not straight! But...that's not quite right. I bought a sewing machine because going to a tailor gets expensive (and I found a sewing machine for under $60), and I had a lot of time on my hands. And I've had a lot of time on my hands for months now. Why? Well...that begins my story.

About six months ago, I was helping a child in my toddler class wash his hands, and as I was standing up, I felt this pop in my back. I suddenly could not walk or sit or move, really, without terrible pain. I burst into tears in front of my students, my coworkers, a parent and a student teacher. I had to be taken on a stretcher to the ER, the most embarrassing part of which wasn't my kids asking me if I was ok, or crying while being lifted onto the stretcher, or even knowing that people were watching me as I was being wheeled out of the huge building I work in and out into the rain. The really embarrassing part was that I didn't even do much and suddenly I was so utterly useless.

This isn't the first time I've had some big health issue for no reason. In high school I had strange poppings and pain in my lower back and hips, making me miss a good chunk of my senior year leading my dance team. I was told many times that I was young and shouldn't have back problems. Nine months of diagnostics later, I found out dance was exactly what caused the injury to my SI joint, making my hips too flexible and causing misallignment. So I had to quit that passion. I've had many bouts of multiple bilateral kidney stones that weren't caused by diet, as well as recurring ovarian cysts on both sides. I couldn't explain why I was always in pain and throwing up and staying home. I later found out that not only did I have endometriosis, a condition that causes pain, cysts and infertility, but I also suffered from medulary sponge kidneys and renal tubular acidosis. This is what caused my almost 30 kidney stones in just 3 years.

Of course, I'm not writing this blog to complain and bitch and say, "Oh poor me!" I think I've done enough of that to my poor boyfriend over the last five months. A month of that I couldn't leave my own bed, get dressed on my own, even bend down to get a pot and cook myself some lunch. They determined I had no spinal or disk damage, but had worn out the muscles in my back during the three years I had spent teaching toddlers. Over the next four months, I went to physical therapy, building up the muscles in my back and was overjoyed when I was cleared to go back. However, my company, which is closing the child care center I work at later in the year, put me in the first wave of teachers to be laid off.

So here I am...at home. With lots of time on my hands. Once again, I feel that my body has told me I have to give up one of my passions: teaching young children. And this leads me back to sewing, and this blog. I had a hard time finding things to do during those four months at home, and put a lot of time and effort into my jobs search for the fall. After a lot of soul searching, and reflection on what put me in the position I was in, I decided not to look into child care anymore and commit to looking for the kindergarten or first grade position I had longed for since I graduated from college. I found that this search goes much, much slower. So when my new pants were too long and my pathetic hand stitching didn't cut it, I bought a sewing machine. A fire lit under my butt and I thought, "Hey! I don't have to sit around all day, watching bad television and lamenting over my situation. I can sew!"

And "sew" I did. I've decided to create a new passion, and rekindle an old one as well: writing. This is my blog documenting my efforts to better myself and learn a trade that I never thought I would use. I've had a little bit of training as a kid, but for the most part, I am winging it. Looking here and there, picking up techniques online and in books and hoping that I can turn this into a real hobby. And of course, venting my frustrations on the internet. :)